|Happy birthday, rosy5000!
||[May. 14th, 2009|07:13 am]
Today is rosy5000's birthday - one of the sweetest people I know in fandom! So of course, I had to Clex-spam her!
*thrusts posts into yielding ground*
Why does doing this always make me think about Lex? I wonder what he's doing right now? Maybe he's bending over the pool table....hey, my eyes are getting hot!
Son, you have to be a bit more careful with your heat vision...
Chloe: "That's weird. We were just talking about Lex and that lamp exploded."
Clark: "That IS weird!"
"Clark, it's natural to....touch yourself. Everyone does it. But maybe you should find a private spot outside. The barn is so flammable."
"Okay, maybe moving outdoors wasn't a great idea. Maybe you should go and hang out with your friends. Distract yourself."
*think unsexy thoughts! think unsexy thought!*
*sprays fire wildly*
"Clark, I can't help noticing a certain trend-"
"Trend? What trend? This is Smallville, Lex. Weird stuff....just happens."
Lex is wearing a tight shirt today...and he keeps doing sexy stuff with his mouth...
Oh no, I set him on fire!
"LEX! PLEASE DON'T BE HURT!"
"Clark, I'm starting to see a pattern here."
*the next day*
"Son, I'm sorry to say: I don't think it's safe for you to hang out with Lana and Chloe any more. In fact, avoiding girls altogether might be a good idea."
"I couldn't agree more."
"Mr. Kent, I suggest that Clark comes to stay with me in Metropolis for a few days. We can go to all the museums, maybe a hockey game...I wrote up an itinerary."
*Jonathan thinks it over; Martha notices that Lex's nose is singed and draws her own conclusions*
"I think that's a very generous offer, Lex. Clark! Put on your formal flannel and pack your pajamas!"
"Lex, aren't you afraid of what could happen? When we're alone together, I get so excited..."
"I wouldn't have it any other way. I can handle you, big boy."
"Oh, and the penthouse comes equipped with flame retardant walls, several dozen fire extinguishers and a sprinkler system. Nothing's going to stop us, Clark!"
I have the best boyfriend in the world!
'caps by acampbell
Happy birthday, darling! Wishing you an awesome day and birthday dreams of Lex and Clark and Harrison Ford, with "Silent Lucidity" on the soundtrack!